Dilema

Need my own place, need my own shelter
I've come this far just to realize my scars.
You've held me high, too high I won't come down
You tried to erase my pain, my tears
Thinking of a coward I point myself
a battle inside, no more courage
You accepting while I'm drowning in my own thoughts, dilema
Too afraid to having, and to let go
Where's the power I have all this time?
I'm pointing a zero in my heart, not brain
Hard to believe and to see, that's what they say
and I'm having a fight, versus myself, here in my head.

The City of Angel

This place where I walk, where I live

The air I breath everyday, the water I drink

This is the city of Angel

I love the stranger, I like how the glance they do to each other 

The sound they make, the sound of emptiness

growls in the sky, birds are all falling, crows

cries of the children, who plead their mothers to stay

leaves are falling, this is the dark Fall we walk

steps from the past, got me tangled 

where's the rain I asked, which wash me up from this sins

The city of Angle, let the night falls

listen to the melody, translate them to your language, understand them

betrays and hates fills you lungs, hard to breath

Why is this happening to us?

The place where we hang, each others dreams.

Innocent mind

Step by step they're making their own destination
walking on their path, with litanies on their shoulders
living up the dreams they had from the childhood
getting conflict with mortals, moaning over their fate
the burden gets more burdensome everyday
then the troubles came
some tries to cover them up
some, runs away
some, takes them easy and jump,
reaching what they have to reach,
irritates the innocent mind..

I'm tired hearing all of your repines, just, shut up, and walk.

The oxygen of living

I walk a hundred miles just to seek the truth
passing the shattered souls along the way
brings up all those old memories
of what we fought, with doubt
of what we love, with no logic
some of them dried up, just like plums
become a dust, blown by the wind

now somehow the pictures fills my head
the picture of the Eden we used to live
the pictures of a paper boat, floating under the moonlight
the whisper that flows with the wind
the love that fills the air
fills my nose, my throat, my lungs
it feels alive now..

Alpha and Omega

Despite the horror of today, I'm a new man, a new beginning, a new alpha
longing of the past rings me up, as an alarm for a new day
dream of something beautiful never hurts
ask for more, give all yours, bring all the fresh things


Until now, I'm standing here, alone
looking upon the people around me
how they act, how they speak, how they think, how they see the different things
acceptance and the denies, that's all what they can pick
some heart are closed, tight closed
well, some are opened, the happiness are spread between 


It's been too long to look on others 
I'm getting tired, I closed my eyes
my grip's catching a mirror
here I go, seeing my own reflection now
try to understand what's in me, myself
trying to finish things on my own
trying to be my own omega

Smile

Leave the pain, leave the pain
weather you're alone or with someone
put a smile instead
rip you frown and throw it away

A New Hello

It's today, the day where we're waiting for
the time where you got to let me go, free
every preparations that I've been through
this is the time when  I pay it back


Stepping on the cold floor, bare feet
I see the sun peeks out of the curiosity from my window
smells of toasts from downstairs
I glare my suitcases a little, and go down


Good morning world, here I am
ready to fight my dream and make my own destiny, history
even if this is a goodbye for you, it's a new hello for the new me
no more stumbling on the old things
here's my new opportunity, it comes and goes, and give me changes, 
one more time


Hours ticking, the loves send me to the place where I could go
hands are waving, tears dropping to their cheeks,
as I walk, I smile, thinking of the new page I'll turn
no doubt I place my mind and heart to the new place


unfamiliar and cold, 
but I'm sure as the time goes by, 
it'll get warmer in no time



___
I got the inspiration from my sister.

False Move

there is a story about this girl, full of dreams and passions..
about how she falls without dropping her tears
about how she gets separated from the social and still strong
all about her strengths inside her


she makes people around her happy and satisfy
that goes on in her mind were like a fantasy, it was a magic


as she were stumbled and kneel
there where she founds Adam's breed
and the chemical things in her body started to dance, like crazy
afraid of getting rejected, the boundaries are coming
bound the dreams, the future


pretending to be strong
she falls, again
laughter comes and goes
cheapen glares from the corners
black shadows swallowed her pride
now her world slowly turns upside down 
the world making fun of her


she's now crossing her fingers and start to pray..
wish, the world revolved backwards  

A human definition

what do people praise, above them all, are usually their own kinds
not Gods nor Goddess, not them with no power nor rights
the puny and poor human, with their common sense upside down

they thought the see the bare things, while eyes are too heavy to open
they insist that they hear the truth, while ears are tight shut
they sure they speak the right things, while throat are covered by filth they speak

what do we know? the truth?
where is the truth? is there any truth out there?

we act like we're smart whereas this brain's only a completer of our body
deny, distrust each other
try to find some eligible things to exchange
then keep what is actually we don't need
we steal from each other, and no
we don't share, we never share

and a last, we disappear under self proud, satisfied

Unspoken goodbye

when you are already at the end of the road

wind pass by, just like that, doesn't care 

and when you try to see clearly, the people you know

who are you thought the place you can rely on, leaving you

the pain that doesn't carried, feels like it fell on you

when your throat feels numb and your lips are dry

can't even scream for help, such a pain

they're leaving, they're leaving, they're leaving

nothing you can do

is it so hard to say goodbye?